In our fast-paced world, the allure of instant gratification is ever-present. From the quick thrill of a scrolling through FaceBook and Instagram to the convenience of fast food, our brains are wired to seek out immediate rewards.
However, the power of our choices lies not in the easy paths we often take but in the moments when we sit with the discomfort of decisions that align with our long-term goals. I had just read an article how the most simplest tool to teach a child is delayed gratification and can see where this would be beneficial at a young age.
The Brain and instant gratification
Our brains are complex organs designed to keep us alive and thriving. One of its primary functions is to seek out rewards, a process deeply rooted in our evolutionary history. The neurotransmitter dopamine plays a crucial role in this reward-seeking behavior. When we do something pleasurable, like eating a favorite snack or receiving a compliment, our brain releases dopamine, giving us a feeling of happiness and satisfaction. You know that warm fuzzy you get when someone says "you look nice today". Yes, that is that quick hit of dopamine.
Unfortunately, our brain has been trained well on seeking pleasure when its bored, scared, sad, happy, or even frustrated. It wants to either scroll, snack, shop, or anything to escape whatever the uncomfortableness it is feeling and get that quick jolt of dopamine. Trying to train our brain to be uncomfortable is not difficult but does take some effort. Learning to just sit and feel the feeling of boredom can be quite funny. Your brain will offer you many quick fixes-a hand full of pretzels, a hour looking at funny dog reels, or maybe shopping on amazon. Does the brain ever offer something productive like "hey, let's go take a walk or how about lets clean out that messy "junk drawer"? Heavens NO! It was to do something that feels good and safe. That is what it is wired to do. We just need to understand that it will offer us lots of options but we need to chose the options that will be in line with our goals.
The Power of Choices
Every day, we make countless choices that shape our lives. Some are small and seemingly insignificant, while others have far-reaching consequences. The power of choice lies in recognizing that every decision, no matter how minor, can either move us closer to or further away from our goals. I like to think of it as exploring the result of the decision. For example, choosing to exercise instead of lounging on the couch might not offer immediate pleasure. Still, it contributes to our overall health and well-being in the long run. Similarly, opting to save money instead of making an impulsive purchase can lead to financial stability and peace of mind. Being aware that our brain is not going to offer us a productive idea-we have to use our pre-frontal cortex to override the primal brain. Once you start recognizing how your brain is working against your goals, you can call her out. I have many names for my primal brain and some are not very nice.
Embracing Discomfort
Making choices that align with our long-term goals often involves sitting with discomfort. This discomfort arises because our brain is not getting the instant dopamine hit it craves. However, it's in these moments of discomfort that real growth happens. When we choose to sit with discomfort, we are essentially retraining our brain. Over time, we learn to find satisfaction in the delayed rewards of our choices. This process requires mindfulness and a conscious effort to stay present and committed to our goals. For instance, when I am done with dinner, my brain wants a snack. Crazy, I know. I am not hungry but my brain offers all these snacks to me-either a piece of chocolate or some salty nuts. Yep, I sometimes listen to her and she gets the best of me. However, sometimes I laugh and say NO, we are not going there.
Practical Tips for Embracing Discomfort
Set Clear Goals: Having a clear understanding of what you want to achieve can help you make better choices. Write down your goals and revisit them regularly to stay motivated.
Practice Mindfulness: Mindfulness techniques, such as meditation or deep breathing, can help you stay present and aware of your impulses. This awareness can make it easier to resist the pull of instant gratification. I am not do meditation except my ten minutes of yoga but I do love deep breathing exercises. It calms me!
Create Healthy Daily Habits: Establishing healthy habits can reduce the mental effort required to make good choices. For example, meal prepping healthy lunches can make it easier to avoid the temptation of fast food. Meal prepping doesn’t have to be a lot of work. It can be grabbing yogurt, nuts, carrots, peanut butter, for a quick lunch.
Reward Yourself: While it's important to avoid instant gratification, rewarding yourself for sticking to your goals can provide positive reinforcement. Choose rewards that support your long-term objectives. For instance, if you pay off a bill and trying to get out of debt, treat yourself to a facial or pedicure. By yourself a pair of smaller size jeans if you lost your ten pounds.
Seek Support: Surround yourself with a supportive community or find a coach (lol) who can help you stay accountable and provide encouragement during challenging times.
The power of our choices lies in our ability to embrace discomfort and resist the lure of instant gratification. By understanding how our brains work and implementing strategies to stay committed to our long-term goals, we can make choices that lead to a more fulfilling and purpose-driven life. Remember, growth happens in the moments when we sit with discomfort and choose the path that aligns with our deepest aspirations. Don’t let that primal brain be in charge!
You got this.
Have a beautiful day!
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